Buy Grindhouse Presents, Planet Terror – Extended and Unrated Online.

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First, a word about this childish boycott. “Grindhouse” gave us two gleaming genre films for the brand of one in the theaters. It was a once in a lifetime experience for most of us and a chance to glimpse the two most bada$* directors in Hollywood give us 3+ hours of hardcore dismay entertainment including the funniest faux-trailers your likely to ever observe. And it bombed. Mountainous time. Why? Because sluggish America said it’d wait for the DVD because the film was too long and lost the chance to serve a truly quick-witted belief and display that we are sick and tired of cardboard cutout PG-13 teen dismay and terrible remakes of beloved cult classics. They went to explore “Disturbia” instead. “Grindhouse” was what good fear fans -hell, what all honest film fanatics- have been dying for and shame on all of you who missed it. So the studio took a loss for taking a chance on this conception and as a result, they’ve split the two films up with extra scenes that were slit for time and are giving us these two films as we haven’t yet seen them, each in double-dic editions packed with extras. Awesome, proper? Weeeeeellllll, now the same whiners who stiffed the films in the theaters are wrathful they missed out and want both films on one DVD (as if there’d even be room) for a discount heed. Sorry, but it don’t work that device. The theatrical lop was packaged as fair that, an experience for the theaters simulating the double-feature drive-in days of customary. Even if that experience would translate to DVD, why would the company re-release it in a compose that already failed miserably? The bottom line is this: we now have another chance to explain that THIS is what we as fright fans want to gape and the only draw to do that is to take these great-looking DVDs. The view that making the films bomb yet again on DVD is going to lead to some super-duper deluxe theatrical edition must have been conceived in the mind of a five year dilapidated on crack. If we don’t befriend these editions, these films will die and the studio will slay no more money on this failed project or any like it in the future. This is basic business sense. Relieve moral dismay and boycott crappy remakes and bloated sequels *cough*Spiderman3*cough* instead.

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“Planet Panic” as you already know, was Robert Rodriguez’s half of “Grindhouse” and while it’s artistically injurious to it’s sister film (Tarantino’s “Death Proof”), Rodriguez brings the campy action, hardcore gore, and zombie awesomeness hard and hastily like you know he can. The music, as always, rocks and grooves, the deaths will perform you laugh and recoil in disgust, and Rose McGowan may well be the sexiest thing on the planet. The tale is nonsense, of course, and the dialogue is hammy and shooting a grenade launcher directly into the ground will NOT start you into the air (not in one section, anyway) like a superhero, but this film is of the kind where this sort of unreal madness only makes you appreciate it more and leaves you drunk and giddy with the chaos. It’s funny, but you will adore it. Mighty of “Planet Dread” makes me feel like I’m watching the most kicka$# video game ever made; a game I’d really adore to play.

The movie is packed with recurring jokes and droll, memorable dialogue (worthy of which is based on Rose McGownan’s right personality) that pays off in spades down the line. Rodriguez did not skimp on the cast, either. Certain, he cast most of his family plus his doctor and even his freakin’ real-estate agent, but they are all amazing. Bruce Willis chews the scenery, Freddy Rodriguez is THE zombie-killing machine, Quentin Tarantino plays “rapist #1″, and you know it’s a honest undead party when Tom Savini hits the scene. Also, Fergie plays a lesbian who gets her brain eaten by the marauding undead. Yes, I know if this was realistic the scene would have played out like the Simpsons episode where the zombies moan “braaaaaainsss” as they feel her head and then, finding none, leave the so-vapid-she’s-sexy pop tart to ponder her 15 minutes of fame; but like I was saying, this is not a realistic movie and any wearisome Black-eyed Peas member is a profitable one.

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If anyone knows how to do extras lawful, it’s Robert Rodriguez. You’ve got the standard commentary, plus the audience reaction track from the film’s premiere (a personal accepted), his patented “10 itsy-bitsy film school”, and yes, the “Machette” trailer calm precedes the film. Sweet. The rest of the bonus features largely mirror the “Death Proof” DVD with lots of cherish for the cast and stuntpeople; very informative and very absorbing. I was actually hoping for more restored footage to the loyal movie then we earn (more crazy babysitter twins, anyone? ) and the visual defects and missing reel -which was fun in the theater- are level-headed there and not nearly as cute, but these are my only gripes. I could seriously write for days about all the things I adore about this movie, but I’ll impartial say one more thing before wrapping up: I positive could go for some barbeque.

“Planet Horror” brings some seriously awesome action-horror that delivers everything you want in a zombie film and you’d be a fool to pass on it honest because you don’t rep a whole other movie free. Grasp it, steal “Death Proof”, and then go wave your copies at the moron down the street who’s boycotting.

The best portion of Grindhouse (besides the deceptive trailers) was Robert Rodriguez’s Planet Dread, which is now on DVD nearly a month after Quentin Tarantino’s Death Proof was released. Though the Weinstein Company sadly decided to split the films for home video release (besides Machete, the groundless trailers aren’t here), the pair’s Grindhouse films are an experience to say the least. Planet Awe revolves around Go-Go dancer Cherry (Rose McGowan) and her ex-flame El Wray (Freddy Rodriguez) who are caught in the middle of an undead outbreak. As survivors bag together, the military steps in with their acquire intentions, and thus let the blood bath originate. What really makes Planet Awe so helpful is that Robert Rodriguez is clearly having a blast with the proceedings, as he pays exquisite homage to the exploitation flicks that inspired Grindhouse as a whole. There’s nifty gore effects from industry master Greg Nicotero, and the rest of the cast, including Bruce Willis, Josh Brolin, Marley Shelton, Michael Biehn, Jeff Fahey, Stacy Ferguson, and Lost’s Naveen Andrews, produce memorable turns as well. Instantly delicious for zombie addicts and Rodriguez fans alike, Planet Apprehension is a deliciously bloody and gooey treat.
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This entry was posted on Saturday, November 28th, 2009 at 5:55 pm and is filed under Grindhouse Presents, Planet Terror - Extended and Unrated. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

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